Cypress 2010
The Cypress Hills 2010 Ride from Scramble’s Perspective
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A random weirdo (me-Scramble).
It was a major blow when the weather forced the cancellation of the Cypress ride on the weekend of May 29th/30th. I spent a few days sulking and was really happy when we started talking about going the following weekend. I hadn’t done a camping trip on the bike yet and started packing early. It was surprising how quickly my Kawasaki soft side bags filled up. I didn’t have any other bike specific bags. So, I filled old army back-pack and strapped it to the seat. It was ugly, and the bag almost fell off a couple of times, but I would eventually figure it out.
We were supposed to leave at noon but Invariant let work get in the way and decided a meeting was more important than riding his bike. So, we left an hour later at 1:00 pm and he still hadn’t eaten. So, we pulled over for a burger before we left. People were asking us where we were going and “The Cypress Hills” wasn’t fancy enough for Invariant. He was telling people we were on our way to Mexico. I could tell they were very impressed.
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Preparing to leave Saskatoon.
When Invariant was done delaying the trip we finally made it out on the road. The winds were horrific. Car drivers would tell us they were getting blown all over the road. On the way to Rosetown my shoulders began to ache with hanging onto the sideways leaning bike, due to the cross winds. After overtaking a car to position myself behind a semi, the winds buffeting off the semi gave the bike such a bad wobble that I couldn’t control. I thought I was going to get thrown off the bike into the path of the car I had just overtaken. Upon overtaking the semi I was blown onto the hard shoulder on the other side of the road and Invariant would later tell me he couldn’t figure out what the f#@K I was doing, until he tried overtaking and got blown over as well. But the most exciting bit, when we got to display the AWESOMENESS of the dual sport bike, was yet to come.
We were going about 115 km/hr according to the KLR speedo. A couple of cars raced past us on an unsafe spot of road. I was just looking at them, thinking they sucked, when their brake lights came on and they slowed down. In fact, they stopped at the end of a long line of cars. As we slowed down, I could see that Sask. Highways had the entire road closed off in both directions and there were about 60 to 100 cars stopped in front of us. I slowed slightly, looked over to Invariant, and pulled over into the ditch just as we reached the cars that had sped past us. We bounced past the first cars and the drivers looked longingly out at us. It was fun in the ditch but I hadn’t strapped the bag down very well, so it was moving around a little and I had to try and keep in place with my back. As we bumped along in the ditch, progressing past the line of cars, we could see that people had been sitting there for a while. One girl got out of her car and stood by the ditch to watch us. I could tell she liked me. There was a guy sitting beside his road bike with his helmet off. He looked over longingly as we bounced past, thinking, “I wish I was a real man like those dual purpose riders.” As we got to the bit where the Sask. Workers were there were some work trucks in the ditch that we rode around. The Sask. Workers looked at us and thought, “Can they do that.” We were just getting past the workers and I was thinking we could get back on the road soon, when I saw Invariant's rear wheel start to spin and slide sideways. Then I saw the water splashing up. Oh cr$p. We slid through the pond without dropping the fully laden bikes and made it back onto the highway. That is how a dual purpose rider rolls…
The rest of the ride was pretty uneventful. The wind finally died down around Sask. Landing and we made it into Maple Creek at approximately 5:00 pm and had supper there. Then we headed out to the West Block via Fort Walsh. It is quite a climb and we felt the air get much cooler and I must have lost about six ponies due to a reduction in oxygen. The switch backs climbing up the hill were AWESOME and we really leaned those bikes over.
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The steep switch-backs.
We made it to the Ranger’s Station campground around 8:00 pm to find the place practically deserted. It is a self-registration site in the middle of the wilderness. We were keen to unload the bikes and get the tents set up, then head over to Elkwater via the back road to meet up with Kiffer and his buddy. The country was eerily quite, like the calm before the storm, and getting darker all the time. When we were finally ready to leave at 10:00 pm it was starting to rain and quite dark. Any sensible person would have waited with the tents until the morning. However, Invariant and I decided that it would be more fun to ride the bikes through the rain rather than sit in tents. So, we set off into unknown territory and the rain got harder. With a combination of gps, maps, spider sense and luck, we made our way along the slick muddy road in the black of night. The rain fogged up my goggles considerably. In one section the rain was so bad that a portion of the road was collapsing. We made it through the deep mud, and a couple of scares with black cows, to find one of the coolest little bouncy and windy portions of tarmac. We raced around it onto a major road and into Elkwater. We were just trying to figure out where Kiffer might be parked, when we spotted a trailer with two KLRs on the back, at the registration centre: Kiffer!!
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The Ranger's Station campground.
After visiting with Kiffer and his buddy for forty five minutes or so, we decided to head back to our campsite in the wilderness. After another couple of close calls with black cows we made it back and hit the sack, ready for an exciting day. My head alarm went off at 7:00 am and we got up into the cold morning to get the bikes ready. After a quick chain lube we set off to Elkwater to meet up with the Kiffer, his buddy, and anybody else that might show up. We were a little late so we didn’t spare the ponies. The small track was slimy and rutted with muddy portions, but we opened up the bikes and had fun on the awesome trail. We reached Elkwater well ahead of schedule, taking only 25 minutes from the campsite. We pulled our bikes into the parking lot and headed into the restaurant. I was surprised at how posh the place was. The waitress didn’t seem too pleased to see us in our dirty bike gear and I realized that we must have smelled really badly; after sitting us at the table we requested the waitress gave an apologetic smile to the people beside us and opened the window beside Invariant. I am sure he smelled worse than me. I felt even worse when I realized that Kiffer and the gang were in the correct restaurant down the road having breakfast. That restaurant was much more “common”. The breakfast was good and Invariant decided to lighten the load before riding and headed into the bathroom for a bit. When we were done we headed to the petrol station for the 9:30 meet to see how many people showed up.
When we got to the station two riders from Medicine Hat were already there, Iggythump and B. We had a chat and filled up the bikes while we waited. The pump I used refused to switch off when the tank was full and I got gas all over my bike and tank bag. The cute girl apologized and said it had happened before. We went inside to pay and Kiffer turned up with the rest of the gang. Invariant took one look outside the window and exclaimed, “Oh no. It’s a KLR fest!” Invariant was hoping to not be the only non-KLR rider. It was interesting to note that the fellow who was traveling with Kiffer, and coincidentally shares his first name with Kiffer (and will therefore be known henceforth as Kiffer-2), was riding an almost identical bike and sporting an identical yellow jacket. Kiffer and Kiffer-2 certainly made the handsome couple. If I hadn’t previously met Kiffer’s lovely family I would have wondered about the two of them. A guy has to be very sure of his manliness to go riding with his buddy in matching yellow jackets…
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Kiffer and Kiffer-2 in matching yellow jackets.
Apart from the Mad Hatters, Invariant, Kiffer, Kiffer-2 and I, there were two riders from Swift Current who I will call K-1 and K-2. The first thing I noticed about K-1’s bike was that it was extremely clean and well looked after. I don’t think my bike has been that clean from the day I bought it.
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Some of the riders at the gas station.
We soon set off with the Mad Hatters leading the way. The weather was strange, with hot sunny bursts and intermittent cold and threatening dark overcast clouds. The first trail we looked at was still closed due to the high amount of rain. So, we continued on along some gravel roads for about half an hour. At one point we lost Kiffer and Kiffer-2 due to a loose license plate. The plate was fixed and we quickly reached what would end up being the most damaging section of the ride. We went up and down a couple of steep hills with no injuries, then we reached a steep little valley, or large crevasse, littered with boulders and stones. The Hatters and Invariant made it down and up the crevasse safely, but K-2 lost control of both wheels on the descent and the bike went down. The mirror appeared damaged and the right-hand side fairing was smashed. K-2 managed to upright the bike and get up the other side of the crevasse. Next was my go and I also made it down and up successfully, without applying much brake on the way down and plenty of gas on the way up. The rear wheel kicked from side to side quite violently on the way up. That coupled with the loose boulders made the ascent quite difficult.
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Iggythump waiting to help riders up the hill.
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K-2 ascending after his fall.
The first crevasse was quickly followed by a second crevasse that had a hidden surprise; after coming over the lip and committing to the descent, a rider was presented with the shock of a hidden bank of snow at the bottom. Several riders made it down, through and up, but K-1 took a nasty fall and banged his hip.
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Scramble at the top of the crevasse with K-1 taking a nasty fall in the background.
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Invariant going through snow filled crevasse.
The snow filled crevasse was not the only nasty surprise the hills had in store for us. Shortly after all of the riders made it up the second crevasse, lightning and thunder shook the hills and the heavens opened up and dumped a swimming pool of water on each of us. It was at this point that the group decided to head back instead of tackling the three crevasses ahead of us. It was also at this point that Kiffer decided to fix his clothing. So, with everyone else on their bikes and the rain pouring down, Kiffer took off his moderately waterproof jacket to fix his suspenders. We watched as Kiffer’s white cotton shirt quickly soaked up the water and an additional pair of headlights was turned on. Then, just as the rain started to slacken, Kiffer got his semi-waterproof jacket back on over his soaked clothing and we started back across the crevasses.
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K-2 blasts through the snow bank on the way back.
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K-2 takes a tumble and Scramble does the funky chicken.
On the way back up the first crevasse Invariant went up the middle of the boulders and lost traction. The big KTM didn’t go down, but he did stop in the middle of the hill, unable to go up any further. Eventually, the rest of the riders came to his rescue and hauled the big bike up the hill, much to Invariant’s chagrin. Invariant would later say he should have carried more speed into the start of the ascent.Most of the other riders avoided the last bouldery hill and went around it.
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Invariant starting back up the first crevasse.
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Invariant getting a helping hand, or two, up the hill.
Once we all made it out of the boulder filled crevasses alive, we took an easier route back along the valley towards the Sask. side of the park. Once back in Saskatchewan we decided to split the group, with some riders taking a difficult route up a washed out trail, and another group taking the gravel road to meet up at the conglomerate cliffs. Then we took a quick stop at Fort Walsh but we didn’t stay for long because another storm was brewing.
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Taking a quick break before splitting into two groups for a bit.
We hoofed it out of Fort Walsh and back down the switch-backs before the storm hit. Then we headed up into the Centre Block and along the Gap Road. The Gap Road is more of a graded track across some fields. Some parts were fairly dry but very rutted. Other parts were flooded with standing water. I had a couple of close calls after getting my wheels stuck in ruts, or even worse, when one time I got my front and rear wheels stuck in different ruts at high speed. Thankfully, those big knobs on the side of my D606s were able to bite into the side of the rut and haul my bike out before I wrecked. Invariant was riding ahead of me and he had a crazy moment when he flew off the road, but instead of slowing down and trying to get the bike under control, he got on the gas, curving through the scrub and over the rocks, then jumping off the two foot ledge back onto the road, and still managed to stay in front of me?!!
We carried along the Gap Road until we hit a patch of road that was covered with standing water for about 15 m. The road over this patch was very deep mud and there was no way around. We went through one by one. Everyone made it through, but K-2 had what might be the wildest ride I have ever seen. K-2 has stock tires on his KLR, which everyone knows are not the best in mud. He got about half way through before his back tire swung right out. He managed to correct the swing, but too much, and the tire swung out wildly to the other side. Before you could say, “Bucking Bronco”, K-2’s ride was flipping from side to side like a crazy beast. I don’t know how he even managed to stay on, let alone stay under reasonable control and get through the mud. He didn’t even fall off, but regained control and rode up the hill; unbelievable!!
We made it to the Cypress Hills resort and had some lunch. Coming out of the resort a couple of Harley bikers rode past with their loud pipes and no helmets on. Idiots! We rode back along the Gap Road considerably slower, as everyone was tired and had full bellies. Back at the West Block we took a gravel road back towards Elkwater on the South side of the hills. Just before Elkwater we rode into a huge storm. No one had time to put waterproofs on, but I plugged in my electric vest. The thing has to be water proof, right? It was lovely, after a hard day of riding, any water that got through the outer jacket was heated by the liner and it felt like I was having a Jacuzzi in my jacket. I looked over at the other riders hunched down against the rain. They looked like they were freezing (I would later learn that was true). The rain eased as we got into Elkwater. The Mad Hatters took off home to try and appease the angry women in their lives and the rest of us had supper. Kiffer, Kiffer-2, K-1, and K-2, headed off to their camp sites and Invariant and I started the 40 km ride back to our camp. We started off slowly, but somewhere along the way Invariant decided that we hadn’t had enough fast riding that day, and he started getting faster and faster. Finally, trying to keep up with him on the slippery muddy dirt track, I found myself braking and sliding into the corners at the last moment, then getting on the gas early and steering out of the corner with my rear wheel, and Invariant is still pulling off into the distance! I was relieved when cows came out onto the road and he had to slow down. We made it back to the camp site and we made a huge fire in the pit. It was great to relax after a hard day’s ride. We enjoyed the fire and a large slab of cookies. It is normal for two guys to sit around a camp fire and talk about the stars, right?
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Scramble enjoying the campfire after a hard day of riding, with the huge slab of cookies on the table.
It was a cold night and there was frost on the grass when we woke in the morning.
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It was still cold when we got up in the morning (3.1 C)
We met with Kiffer, Kiffer-2, K-1 and K-2 at Elkwater early the next day. K-1 and K-2 planned to break camp and head back to Swift via the scenic route. So, we planned to ride out on the start of Kiffer’s big ride, then circle back and take one of the ATV trails back to our campsite. We followed Kiffer out of Elkwater and he started riding like the devil was his pillion passenger and he was trying to get away. When we got on the gravel road (which had deep gravel across the entire width) I sped up to about 120 km, Invariant was ahead of me pulling away, and Kiffer was in the lead speeding away from both of us. The demon possessed Kiffer rode his bike faster than I can make mine go on the highway, over the deep gravel road, around an “S-bend” and disappeared into the distance. Kiffer deserved to get a ticket for “flying too low.”
We left Kiffer and Kiffer-2 on top of the bench (after forcing them to eat some of the huge slab of cookies) and followed the ATV trail back down to our campsite, through some lovely muddy puddles. We still had a couple of hours to kill, so we explored various ATV trails heading out from our campsite and we found the best trail of the weekend. It was muddy, had washed out sections with foot deep crevasses, and the dried sections were sandy/chalky. At one point I slid my bike into a deep washed out crevasse and was extremely lucky to bounce out of it without falling. At the end of the weekend we found ourselves a few hundred meters from the campsite riding back and forth across a small creek. It was the perfect end to the week, sitting on the side of the warm hill taking video of Invariant being a nutter. Sitting there on the hill we were spotted by K-1 and K-2 who were on their way back home. They waited for us to break camp and we rode back to Maple Creek with them and we all had supper. After supper we said goodbye and headed for home. We had thought the adventures were over, but we were wrong.
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Leaving Kiffer on top of the bench after Kiffer's possessed ride.
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Going through some mud as we came down off the bench before we reached the ATV trail.
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Invariant riding over the small creek. Small washed out crevasse can be seen in center of road.
We headed back to Saskatoon via Kindersly and the wind was much better on the way back. I took ten minutes trying to get my earphones in place to listen to the radio. Three minutes out of Maple Creek the station went dead and I listened to static for thirty minutes. When we got up to Rosetown Invariant and I were wondering if the road would be blocked on the way back. In anticipation we hooked up one of Invariant's cameras to his crash bars and headed out. Sure enough, five minutes out of Rosetown the road was full of stopped cars. We briefly halted to turn the camera on, sped up to the rear of the cars, and hit the ditch. I had thought this return trip around the blockade would be as easy and short as on the way down. I was wrong. The grass was almost waist deep and I couldn't see the ground. I was riding along the bumpy ditch with no way to know if I was riding into a hidden culvert or coming up to a telegraph pole lying in the grass. Any of these things would at least have me off the bike, and I could only hope that the bike nor I would get damaged. To make things worse, the cars from the other side had just been let through. So, it was only a matter of short time before the cars on our side were let through also. This bypass on this side of the road was also at least twice as long as the previous bypass. So, I went faster in the long grass than was safe to, in order to be the cool dual purpose biker that rides around road blocks, knowing in the back of my mind that I was not riding safely, and that it was only a matter of luck, not skill, if we made it through this silly shortcut. As I was riding through the grass, unable to see what was in front of me, I saw a bit of thinner grass and what looked like the ground. I got on the gas and buzzed over to the short grass. As I hit the short grass I learned that what had looked like the ground was actually the top of perfectly still water. The bike plunged into the water and I felt the water spilling over the top of my boots. I could see the start of the dry bank ten foot away, but I had no idea if the pool into which I was riding was six foot deep between here and there. It was already too deep. The fully laden bike slid beneath me and I wondered if Invariant was following me into the pool. If we both got flooded bikes we would look extra stupid as the car drivers drove past and laughed at us. I got on the throttle and sailed through the deep water and hit the dry side. Another hundred meters or so and we were past the blockade and we managed to get back on the highway just before the cars on our side got through. Sometimes I wonder why I do such ridiculous stuff, but everyone has to define what their life is about, right?
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Riding through some of the more shallow water in the ditch on the way home.
The rest of the ride back really was pretty uneventful. No broken bike. No broken bones. No problems. Several new friends and one really cool extreme adventure I will remember for a long time.
Ride safely and get dirty!
